You know you're a railfan when...

Now here is a great item that I know you will all enjoy! I saw it in "The Gondola Gazette" (Newsletter of the Collis P. Huntington Railroad Historical Society, Inc. a Chapter of the NRHS) which came from the "River Runner/Junebug Gazette" - by Charles Williams.

The first 15 entries are by Mr. Williams. However, I know you must have some lines of your own. Why not email them to me and we will add them to the list. Let’s see how big we can make this! If you include your name after your comment, I will post it to give you credit otherwise I will leave it blank. Lets keep it tasteful.

You know you’re a railfan when…

You shop for a house by the tracks instead of away from them!
When planning your next vacation, you choose your travel route based upon the location of active railroads and railroad museums.
When you blow your horn two longs, a short, and a long through every intersection.
Speaking of intersections, you call the signals as you go through them.
You call zoning to ask if you can use a boxcar for a shed.
You wonder why automobiles don’t come equipped with couplers.
While engaged in intimate relations, you suddenly find yourself mentally debating the relative merits of Shay vs. rod engines.
Your wife tells you her water burst, and your first reaction is, "My God, her boiler will be ruined!"
When you wire up the fog lamps to flash alternately when you blow the horn.
When being served dinner, you say, "Easy, easy, that’ll do!" as you’ve gotten enough.
When riding with someone who’s backing into a parking space, you say, "two cars…one car…that’ll do."
When you get a shopping cart with a bad wheel, you tag it and set it aside for the shops to repair, or park it in an aisle and put up a blue flag in front of and behind it.
You curse the dispatcher when you’re held up in traffic.
You’re test driving a hot V6 and think, "This thing can really move in notch 8."
While driving your car, you put your arm on the window sill and wave your hand and blow your horn to all kids standing on the street.
Your wife opens her wallet to show the relatives photos of the children while you open your wallet to show them your latest rail photos from last weeks fan trip.
You install a pedal operated bell in your car and ring it while driving across railroad crossings.
You open your refrigerator door only to find it full of film for the next fan trip.
You find yourself looking for old locomotives and color schemes during the obligatory chase scene through the rail yards when you're watching old cop shows and movies on TV. by Jim Devlin
The efforts of Hollywood to re-create an earlier era using trains is met with your derisive snort, "They didn't have GP40-2's in 1970! Can't they get it right?" by Jim Devlin
You're on Amtrak, you find out that the guy across the isle is a railfan, and your wives look at each other, roll their eyes and sigh. by Christopher Chew
You're in your car and you come up to a railroad crossing. The crossing lights are not flashing and no trains are coming, but you slow to a crawl and look up the track both ways in hope of seeing a train. by Bob Burton
You are on a rail facility tour and start talking to one of the mechanics on the shop floor only to find out that you know more than he does. Anonymous
You rent certain movies at the video store because you know there is a very cool train scene in it. by Melissa Mizell
You refuse to cross the tracks until your favorite train has passed by. by Melissa Mizell
You barbecue using tie butts, for that special flavor!
You tell your wife you are going down to the corner bar to have a few drinks with the guys, however, you go to your favorite train watching spot to take a few photos. by Sam Evans
You are on a highway overpass, at 60 mph you suddenly shout," that's the Seaboard down there!", and you can't believe the others in the car didn't recognize it by the color of the ballast. by Chris Evans
You tell your wife you would like take a nice ride to look at scenery, her interpretation being,"guess I'll take some magazines to look at while he looks at the scenery in the rail yard." by Chris Evans
You can't understand why everyone else doesn't understand what"approach diverging" means. by Chris Evans
It would not be to your advantage for the railroad police to come to your house and look around. by Chris Evans
You get tired of explaining to people that you are not a fireman because you have a radio. by Chris Evans
Your relatives only think of you when they see a train. by Chris Evans
When you are out by the tracks with another railfan people ask, "is the train coming?" by Chris Evans
You get irritated whenever a train wrecks because non-railfans "invade" your special train watching spots. by Chris Evans
You don't like imitation railfans who wear railroad patches all over their clothing. by Chris Evans
The train crews know you by first name. by Chris Evans
You buy a European car so you can drive from the right seat. OR ...you'd rather drive "stick" (without the steering wheel). by Rob Shultz
When all your friends rely on you to tell them when the morning train comes through, so they can avoid it! by William Pou
Your wife starts to like trains to spend time with you (and then in the end has a bigger train collection - books, memorabilia & model trains than you do). ** This is written by the wife** by Nancy J. Morris, RN
You stop at all railroad crossings to wait for the gates to come down.
You are happy to be at a grade crossing when a long freight is passing, while those around you fume.
You see a headlight approaching at a grade crossing, and you slow down when everyone is speeding up.
You take your date to a railroad yard, just to check on what's happening.
You're watching a movie and you say, "New York? How can they be in New York when there's a UP freight going by?"
Everytime you see a steam locomotive on TV or in a movie, you immediately know which one it is and where the sequence was shot.
You have more videotapes from Pentrex, Green Frog, and Scholl than you do from Disney, Universal, or Fox.
You show up trackside to film the fantrip going by and you have so much camera equipment that the locals ask you which TV station you're with.
You're reading a book about choo-choos' to your kid and you stop to explain that they've got the side rods drawn all wrong.
You can find the rail yard in a strange city within 5 minutes of leaving the interstate. Items 41 to 50 were submitted by Nancy J. Morris, RN. They are from "You Know You're a Railfan When...", from "THE COAL BUCKET", January 1997. Their URL is: http://www.cec.wustl.edu/~mjs6/brnrhs.html
All you managed to save from the house fire is your photo albums... By Gary Rose
When you buy an old van for work, paint it silver and trim it with some nice red, white and blue stripes and the get a license plate that says "PHASE 3". (I swear it's true!) By Chris Z.
While driving down the highway, you try to remember what class of locomotive the 2, 3, or 4-digit number on the license tag ahead of you would be on your favorite railroad. By Ken Kanne
You are very anxious to have that roll of family vacation film developed because you know you got some great train shots on that roll, and those are the only pictures you remember (or care about?). By Keith Kanne
You point out the scenes in "White Christmas" where Bing Crosby and the others ride the Santa Fe "San Diegan" and then some unknown Southern Pacific train from Miami to Vermont.
"TRAINS" and "PLAYBOY" arrive in the mail the same day and you open "TRAINS" first. By Tommy Campbell
You're reading this list. By Marie Schwaegerl
You're driving near some tracks with your non-railfan buddies and you see a train and shout "That's some nice GP60'S". By Marie Schwaegerl
Your door bell sounds like a steam engine whistle when someone pushes the button.
Your license plate says "GG1".
You wish you grew up during the 40's & 50's and had a camera so you could get pictures of steam trains in their heyday.
When you see a roadside sign saying "slide area", you reach for your camera loaded with Kodachrome and look for the train. By Mac Owen
You go to your closet and there is no room for clothes because of all the slide files and model railroad boxes. By Mac Owen
Nearly all your family pictures are shot in a loco cab or have trains in the background. By Mac Owen
Framed pictures of trains on the wall by far out number all other pictures in the house. By Mac Owen
The wife's garden has to be laid out with sufficient "right of way" just in case you may want to build a large scale model railroad. By Mac Owen
Your anger arises driving on a highway full of trucks that should be on trains! By Mac Owen
You are reading this list... and understand all of it.
If you have your dog knows its time for a walk when he hears the train whistle. By Amanda Emily
At the age of fourteen, you discover that you know more about locomotives than the engineers do. By Amanda Emily
You ask an auto parts store clerk for a pair of ditch lights, when you are actually looking for a pair of fog/driving lights for your car. By Shin Asai
You say "tower, what's seems to be the problem" when you approach a red light driving a car. By Shin Asai
You place an EMD builders plate on your Toyota. By Shin Asai
You spend more than your monthly income to visit China, South Africa or Poland to ride the steam train. By Shin Asai
You wish you owned an 18-wheeler truck just because it has an air horn. By Shin Asai
You ask a driver at a truck stop if he has a 3-chime or 5-chime horn on his rig. By Shin Asai
You love to iron your clothes just because you want to hear the "steam". By Shin Asai
You refuse to buy Rand McNally's Road Map because it doesn't show the rail lines. By Shin Asai
You love to eat microwave dinners because they remind you of the meals you had on your recent Amtrak ride. By Shin Asai
You call the tourists "daisy pickers". By Shin Asai
Your family vacation cannot be scheduled until the "Steam Passenger Directory" has been published for the season.
You carry a chain saw in the trunk of your car, just in case there is something growing in front of a nice photo opportunity.
All you managed to save from the house fire is you photo albums. By Gary A. Rose
You keep up to date on the latest news about coming gas and DIESEL ELECTRIC generation of cars and trucks...Or for that matter, wishing your pickup was diesel rather than gas powered!
You buy SimCity 2000/3000 just to build a railway. By Chris Burchett
When an engineer asks you what type of engine he's running. By Chris Burchett
You book your motel rooms based on closeness to rail right-a-ways, yards, or photo op locations. By Bill Hupe
The shop you work at backs to the tracks and you have to stop work and run outside every time the train goes by. By Joyce
Every time a train goes by while in the car, you have to yell to the dog "Train, Sundae! Look, train!" By Joyce
The dog gets all excited when she hears the train coming at work and runs to the shop door whining, so she can race you to the tracks and sit watching the train go by. By Joyce
You are constantly trying to figure out how to fit a caboose in the backyard for a "guest cottage". By Joyce
Your FEMALE cat's name is Chessie. By Nancy J. Morris, RN
Your MALE cats name is Peake (Chessie's 'Old Man' - Dad to her kittens). By Nancy J. Morris, RN
You use Chessie or Chessie 614 as a USER ID on an internet auction (and buy lots of C&O items there!). By Nancy J. Morris, RN
You are too sick (due to having sinus surgery) to go on the C&O 614 excursions but you get out of bed (with a 100 degree fever) and have your husband take you to go watch it leave Hoboken to get your 'fix' for the season. By Nancy J. Morris, RN
You write an article on the C&O 614, send it to IHE (Iron Horse Enterpries - Ross Rowland's company) to get the content OK'ed and Ross Rowland HIMSELF calls you personally at home to give you some tips and minor corrections (I nearly had a coronary when this happpened - I thought my hubby was playing a joke on me!). By Nancy J. Morris, RN
You e-mail the secretary of IHE a question and Ross Rowland sends you a reply (not the secretary!). By Nancy J. Morris, RN
When you see a particular train or locomotive, your Blood Pressure rises to DANGEROUS LEVELS (if measured at that time). By Nancy J. Morris, RN
In your sig file for your e-mail you have a detailed ascii drawing of your favorite steam loco! By Nancy J. Morris, RN
To get a Really GREAT photo of the rest of the train crossing a tall THIN viaduct, you lean all the way out of the train window (with only your legs in the car) and have your husband hold on to you so you don't fall. (YES, it was a GREAT photo!) By Nancy J. Morris, RN
You are make Archivist for your model Railroad club at the first or second meeting you attend because you have a good camera! By Nancy J. Morris, RN
When you go to Clifton Forge to visit the C&O HS, you got the older gentleman who was fixing up one of their Cabooses to let you into their Dome/Tail observation car from "THE CHESSIE" even after the lock on the car was stuck. THEN proceeded to take at least 75 photos of the car (inside & out) even though it has not been restored at all! By Nancy J. Morris, RN
Spend HOURS watching the CSX (ex B&O) hump yard in Cumberland, MD just so you can spend the time watching the LAST C&O painted engine in active service operate on the hump! By Nancy J. Morris, RN
You know you're a railfan when you work for the railroad, ignore it all, then when you get home relive it in all it's glory. By Norm
You know you are a railfan when, instead of going to the bicycle store to buy a flashing red light , you go to the store to buy a F.R.E.D. By Jeffrey Trimble

 

All of that is true except my license plate does not say GG1.....I guess that I am not a real railfan

Russ
Hoffman Valley RR

 

Yeah, me too, Russ. Mine says NYC J3A. I would like to meet Nancy Morris, RN.

 

People know I'm a railfan and hate me for it when one of them is driving a car and I scream,

"OOOOHHHHHHH MMMMMYYYYYYY GODDDDDDDDDDDDDD!!!!!!!
LOOOOOOOKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THERE A TRAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It sort of startles them for some reason.......

 

I loved every bit of this! Many of those describe me to a tee.

 

Don't you love the looks on the faces driving behind you when you slow down, and stop at the crossing even though there was sufficient time for both your vehicles and the 18-wheeler five cars back to all make it through?

Of course, there is also the driver directly behind you who is fumming mad because you stopped with sufficient time and he swore up and down that he would be first in line and FINALLY get a picture of his favorite unit. Who knows which is scarier!!

 

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Johnny Trains:

"OOOOHHHHHHH MMMMMYYYYYYY GODDDDDDDDDDDDDD!!!!!!!
LOOOOOOOKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THERE A TRAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!<hr></blockquote>

Johnny - I do not know why, but I just got a vision of Homer Simpson the railfan in my head!

LOL


Russ
Hoffman Valley RR

 

"you know you're a railfan(or working for the railroad too long)when........"

You step off a city bus and you wave the driver
a highball!

Chuck T- Chicago

 

You have a bumper sticker on your car that says "This vehicle stops at all RR crossings"

Your license plate contains the roadname or builder initials and or road number of your favorite locomotive.

Your screen name is derived from your favorite roalroad or locomotive ('uhum, lol)

I don't take credit for this I read them somewhere else sometime back.

[ 01 November 2001: Message edited by: ajy6b ]

[ 01 November 2001: Message edited by: ajy6b ]</p>

 

Russ,
I can see Homer getting run over right now with Bart at the controls!

DOOOOOOOFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

You know your a rail fan when:

You step off the city transit bus and yell "ALL ABOARD"......

Your always seen with a blue and white striped denum engineers hat....

Or your car is painted like your favorite railroads paint schemes was.... With or without the actual railroad name!

 

On the van I always drive for my office (I work for the City, it has "official plates" on it), I have a "Be careful crossing the tracks (GRADE CROSSING) bumper sticker.
People stare at it in bewilderment.
In New York, you don't cross the (SUBWAY!)tracks!
Whata bunch of non-railfans!
LOL!
WAKE UP AND KNOW YOUR TRAINS!

 

Hi Lady Sunshine,

Here's one more for your list.

You know you're a railfan when your bumper sticker reads:

"Steam engines have a tender behind"

And you have to explain it to others.............

Just one more -- you know you're a railfan when you take note of your change at the store and it is $12.18, $6.11, $7.65 or some other "significant" amount.

LOL and toottoot,

Ed

 

Thanks Guys for your posts and to add this part to my first post enjoy you Guys

You know you're an idiot railfan if:
(Additions are at bottom of list - last update 03/25/99)
On your railfan outings, the four food groups become: McDonalds, Taco Bell, Pizza Hut, and Mr. Donut.
Your car has a bumper sticker that says "This vehicle stops at all railroad crossings."
Despite common sense and the instructions that came with the camcorder, you still shoot videos into the sun.
Your railfan territorial dominance is enough to scare away The Black Panthers.
You carry a saw and a BB gun in your camera case to remove ALL obstacles from your shot.
You have a denim vest or jacket that has more patches than the earth has hydrogen molecules.
You've considered contacting the police to obtain permission for using flashing red lights and siren during a train chase.
The sound of a K5LA off in the distance does more for you than a double-shot of prozac and cocaine.
Your definition of the best type of railroad photograph: the "Three-quarter, no-thought roster shot".
Your definition of the best night shot: the "Three-quarter, no-thought roster shot", lit up like the Space Shuttle on launchpad 39B.
Your car's license plate is customized with a locomotive designation, railroad initials, or both.
You've been known to stand on the roof of your car to get that shot over the fence.
Your scanner is on 24 hours a day, seven days a week.
You still live with your parents because you spend too much money on Kodachrome.
You don't realize how stupid or suspicious you look to passing motorists as you stand out in the middle of nowhere with a camera around your neck.
Summer weekends for most men: Beer, Babes, Boats, and Barbecue; Summer weekends for you: refer to #15.
The number 614 gets you more excited than the number 69.
Great moments in your personal history: Learning to ride a bike, graduating from high school, and your first photograph of foreign motive power.
Your cat's name is "Chessie".
Your dog's name is "Conrail".
Your wife threatened to divorce you because you wanted to dye Conrail's fur blue.
Its hot as hell out, the lead unit doesn't have AC, and you still don't understand why the crew has to leave the front door open.
Class I railroads: Alco's suck. Railfans: Alco's Rule!!!
You can tell the difference between a U23B and a B23-7.
If the dispatcher loses track of a locomotive consist, he usually calls you at home for help.
People want to know if you have supernatural powers, because the sun is always shining in your photographs.
You sit in a high school auditorium for hours on a cold winter day, watching thousands of slides and attempting to out-BS the railfan next to you.
You've ever bargained for a cab ride with a warm pizza and a six-pack of Coke.
You refuse to go to Horseshoe Curve any more since they started charging admission.
You hike up the side of the mountain and along dirtbike paths to gain access to Horseshoe Curve now.
That railfan rumor you just heard is too good to be true, but you continue to spread it anyways.
You consider Conrail's "Speak-n-spell" defect detectors to be a warm, caring, and familiar voice.
You go around imitating Conrail's defect detectors.
You believe that your status as a railfan is proportional to the number of cameras around your neck.
You speak softly, but carry a BIG TRIPOD!
You have faithfully written down the shutter speed and f-stop of every shot you've taken for the past zillion years, yet you've really never used that data afterwards.
You scream and chant like a possessed, frothing sportsfan for the train to hit the car that just went around the gate.
You're the first to notice the incorrect numberboards and lift rings on a recently restored locomotive.
Conrail SD80MAC's make you feel tingly all over.
You have a web site set up on railfanning.
You're too damn good to stand in a photo line, so you stand in front of it.
You have slipped or fallen in mud or snow and have successfully saved the camera from the fall (disregard the thirty stitches in your arm to save it).
You've established a large enough network of connections to know every move of the "Office Car Special" and Ringling Brothers' Circus Train throughout the system.
Real men don't need to ask for directions. Real railfans don't need maps.
You feel "one with nature" as you stand on a wooded mountainside overlooking a trestle spanning a river valley as you wait for the train. You then twist your ankle on a rock and drop your camera.
You refer to an F40PH as a "Screaming Thunderbox".
You refer to a Genesis unit as a "Mud Missile".
You and your railfan buddies get into EMD vs. GE arguments the way rednecks get into Ford vs. Chevy brawls.
You've ever looked under the hood of your pickup to see if you could mount a Leslie 3-chime airhorn, only to realize that you'd have to remove the engine block, battery, and master cylinder for it to fit.
You've considered mounting the same horn on the rollbar, only to realize that your pickup would look like an Iraqi mobile missile launcher.
You call Conrail's business train the "Green Weenie".
You refer to the horns on Amtrak locomotives as "Big Hooters".
You were sued for sexual harassment for accidentally making the above comment at work.
You always make a perverted remark every time someone mentions something about "action in the humpyard".
You've ever railfanned drunk.
You've specifically chosen to work the night shift so that you can spend all day chasing trains.
You've ever sat on the passenger side door of a car with your video camera and shot over the roof while one of your buddies drove at speeds in excess of 60 m.p.h. trying to keep up with UP #844 on an excursion.
You have ever caused a 20 car pile-up while trying to get to the shoulder to shoot something that you did not expect to find.
You have ever caused traffic to back up for a half mile while pacing a 15 m.p.h. shortline freight.
You were treated for depression when you heard that Norfolk Southern dropped the fires on 611.
You successfully got your wife involved in railfanning.
She can now "out-railfan" your sorry ass any day of the year.
Difficult decisions at the vending machine - The Milky Way at selection F7 or the Pay Day at E8...
Your little black book has numerous phone numbers - railroad automated tracing services, and one woman - Mother.
Your fiancee left you at the alter when she saw the scanner attached to your cummerbund.
You own at least three Morning Sun books, five Pentrex video tapes, and have least two subscriptions to railroad magazines.
Your refrigerator has barely enough food to feed a rat for half a day, but enough Kodachrome to roster shoot each BNSF locomotive twice.
You're photographing Conrail like there's no tomorrow, just like everyone else, and twenty years from now a Conrail slide still won't be worth the acetate its printed on.
You apply 8th grade algebra when chasing trains ("if train A leaves Allentown at 50mph, and railfan B leaves twenty minutes later at 90mph...").
Lumedyne - the first, the last, THE ONLY name in low-angle-light night photography!!! (and don't you forget it!)
You like Fujichrome Velvia. Then again, you like purple skies and trees on cocaine.
You kept your citation for trespassing on railroad property as an authentic railroad souvenir.
Your railroad data notebooks were more utilized in high school than your class notebooks.
You realize that neither Nikon nor EMD ever made an F6.
You refuse to disembark the train for a photo run-by because the sun isn't shining.
To add to the railroad experience, you sleep in a caboose the night before a railfan excursion.
No matter where a railfan goes and who he/she talks to, your name and bad stories about you are always brought up in conversation.
You know what WGRF stands for (and it ain't no damn radio station!).
You judge other fellow railfans by the quality and quantity of photos and rumors they publish.
You have been labeled as a "foamer" by those who haven't seen my website.
Photo runby rule: Steam or 1st generation diesels - ditch lights off; late 2nd or 3rd generation diesels - ditch lights on.
Kodalux processes your Christmas cards.
During your rebellion teenage years, you had a black t-shirt that said, "Sex, Trains, and Rock & Roll".
You notice that you and the local transients like to hang out in the same places.
Your yard looks like a signal maintainer's backlot.
You've been accused of "RALF-ing" (Railroad Artifact Liberation Front).
You're able to take those "impossible-to-access" shots because you are also an engineer.
You hold on to hope for the Southern Tier line and the D&H.
You've stayed at the Station Inn in Cresson, PA.
You go "out-of-service" from work during fall foliage season the way hunters do on the first day of buck season.
You have to have your photo taken while sitting in the engineer's seat of a locomotive at least twice in your lifetime (once as a kid, the other as an adult idiot railfan). NOTE: The latter photo is usually used on the inside leaf of a book jacket after you finished authoring that book.
You're pissed that the NS computer had misidentified your favorite former Conrail locomotive as a gondola full of chickens, and located it somewhere in the desert of Nevada.
You attend regular post-railfanning grease inhaling sessions at the trackside Steak-n-Shake.
You can't believe that Pentrex (a large, railfan oriented multimedia company) folded "Vintage Rails" and "RailNews" magazines.

 

Wow there LadySunshine,

That there's quite a long list of "railfan qualities".

Thanks for all the work and effort.

We might even come up with some more.

Toottoot,

Edtrain,

 

You know you're a railfan when you make friends like, WATASH, EDTRAIN, EM7600, FITZ, RUSS and others!

 

Thanks Johnny! The feeling is mutual and I am glad to be included in on your list of friends. I believe that this is what any hobby is really about. (OK sometimes it's more of a way of life than a hobby! )

Russ
Hoffman Valley RR

 

Hey JohnnyTrains,

Thanks for the note and for your kind words. I guess we could call ourselves the brotherhood of railfans.......... Some may think that we're just a little "teched" in the head for enjoying trains as we do. But we know better.

I would like to mention LadySunshine as another good friend from this group. Her heart is in the right place .......... with trains and rails. Bless her. In case anyone is interested she is one of the foremost researchers on the Web. She can find info about nearly anthing. Just ask her. She personally manages and operates the Night Owl Surfing Network.

Toottoot,

Edtrain

 

John, I appreciate your feelings and thank you for including me. I would like to meet all of you guys and gals in person. I have met a few of you, and like most railfans met on excursions, you are a great bunch of people. Nothing at all like some of the bad press I have read about us. Just because we have an intense interest in our hobby doesn't make us insane, does it? huh, huh?