I have personally known two fellows who made that choice. I still have very sad thoughts, every time I think of them, as they were great guys. But the one that always haunts me is the time I came upon a person who had just completed the process. No train involved, but it still knots the stomach.
And when the actual accident occurs, that is tragic. I lost a lot of respect for BNSF-legal after an incident over by Custer, MT. Elderly rancher , late 70's, Using his private crossing that had both the mainline and a siding to cross. He slowed down and nosed over the siding to see if a train was coming on the main or not, trying to look around some stored grain cars. There was a train. He got hit and killed. Next day the BNSF legal dept filed suit against family for damage to RR and lost time. etc. Caused a bit of an uproar around here. Upshot of it was, the RR had parked the grain cars on the siding for storage, and hadn't separated them as far as recquired for safely seeing around them. And he had called them about it multiple times. A mistake followed by a fatality followed by a mistake.
I always wanted to work for a railroad, ever since I was very young. Ultimately my wish did come true and now I have been working for a very long time. Its difficult to avoid becoming part of a drama caused by the train's interaction with the public. I have seen more than my share of terrible things on and around railroad tracks and in the last few years my enthusiasm for the job has faded quite a bit. I have lost co-workers and attended funerals for people I worked with day after day. I have walked into work with ambulances parked outside the employee entrance. I have driven up on the scene of a grade crossing wreck and got that sinking feeling seeing all the emergency vehicles parked alongside one of our freight trains. I felt and heard human bodies going under the wheels of my train and watched powerless as the train I was operating collided with a vehicle. I have untangled mountains of bent and twisted steel that used to be freight cars. I have repaired locomotives that still had the blood of the crew in the cab. I have seen employees mangled and the bloody results left behind. I have seen a small town burned to the ground because of one of my companies trains and still I persist in the continuation of my chosen career and I can't for the life of me figure out why ?
As railfans we can sometimes help. This responsible fan probably saved a life this day and also spared the train crew from much grief. The mouthy motorist is a prime example of the problem.
My fellow classmate was really torn up over this, and as I mentioned, he is definitely not a wimp but a rather outgoing person. As to my incident, we(the hogger & I) were to learn later from the Chief Special Agent that this 24 y/o young woman had a history of attempted suicide. they also found a bottle of wine and a glass. She apparently had a drink to calm her nerves. As I mentioned, nothing further ever came of this. It was a clear cut case of suicide. Some of our guys have had multiple suicides and/or train/motor vehicle incidents. My conductor union local chairman(for suburban service) was conductor on a train/car collision. A soccer mom in a hurry to get her kid to wherever, couldn't wait the 30 seconds for the train to clear the crossing. Well she lost! Bob went out to assist the victims and the driver's young son died in his arms. Bob is also a father and it tore him up! As I mentioned, the risks come with the job, Unfortunately it is a sad learning experience. Charlie
You are experiencing the big quandary many railroaders face...."Why am I doing this". I hear you my brother. I took an early retirement once the law was changed. I took a beating on my Railroad Retirement. I loved the job,the money was good. I just had too many physical problems that caused too much discomfort as well as being dangerous. Why should I risk my health for vanity? Charlie
A good friend of mine has his carrier wrecked by a "suicide by train" incident. While he was running his train, a police officer stepped out from behind a bridge abutment at the last moment and took his own life. The officer's police buddies were trying to somehow pin it on him and ordered a blood test, not just the usual P test. Somehow the process went horribly wrong and he acquired a nasty blood infection from the botched procedure that almost killed him and left him disabled.
You're correct! It really is a younger man's game. Mostly the Road Foremen or D.S.L.s prefer to give you a "check ride"via the simulator. All that is,is a computer game! You have quick reflexes,You're OK but if you treat the sim.handles with a ham-hand like you have to do on some of the real locos, you will screw up the game! Working commuter trains on the BNSF "Aurora Racetrack" requires steel nerves, too many joggers using the ROW as a running path while they have ear buds plugged in so they cant hear your whistling. Too many soccer moms speeding their brats to lacrosse practice or ballet and the simply MUST run the crossing gates. High School kids from the many suburbs using the gauge as a shortcut. Too many problems to deal with EVERY day ! It would sound like a litany if I listed what we dealt with on a daily basis in suburban operations. Charlie
Was this in Chicago? I seem to remember an incident where a cop was killed doing just that. PM me if it was and who was the hogger? Charlie
Been there. Mine was not RR related, but it was bad enough the doctors sent my wife home to make arrangements. It screwed me up badly, so I can understand what he is enduring.
As a trucker, I can feel for train crews. I see the things drivers in cars do every night. The laws of physics don't change because you're late for work. I don't know if it's stupidity, arrogance or ignorance. The train (or in my case, truck) is in their way of doing something that they feel is more important that anything else.
