"Beware !! The N-Scale Train Gods"

I can't remember which of Pete Nolans, "Stupid Mistake" threads it was. But it mentioned the Track Gods. I read all the posts in it and found all funny and enjoyable.

 

I always buy 3 of all parts. One for me, one for the Train God, and one for the gremlin that hides behind the water tank.

 

Now if you have not noticed I work out of something called the Klickitat Zen Works with a collection Zen Monks wise in the ways and wiles of the Train Gods. Notice the caps here. Never refer to them in the lower case.

Now under thier wise teachings I have on occassion managed to obtain the ultilmate Satori of having everything go right. We here at the Klickitat Zen Works are prepared to offer out intercessions with the Train Gods for your success with your N Scale endeavors for a modest fee of say one Atlas ice reefer (undec), or 10 sets of SP&S passenger car decals per intercession.

Sincerely
John Four Thumbs Moore, currently residing at the Monkery and meditating on the Koan of the Sound of One Hand Clapping.

 

It seems like when we get enough money together for that brass engine, the train gods attack our vehicles and appliances.

 

Here on the Island of Misfit Toy Trains there are three Gods which reside on Mt. Calamity. These three are malevolent sorts that take great pride in inflicting pain, disappointment and fear into my model railroading experience. I have frequently found myself invoking their names… OUCH (God of pain)… ARRRRGH (God of disappointment) and the leader of all …O’Shiiiii...! (God of catastrophe).

Sometimes they work on their own… such as when I’m working with wood on the benchwork…. OUCH … another splinter in my hand! Trying to solder the 22 gauge wire to the Unijoiner… OUCH… the tip of the soldering is really hot!

When model railroading stuff that I buy doesn’t meet my approval… ARRRGH… another flawed model train from _____ (fill in the blank). When I take shortcuts in building a structure… ARRRGH… I knew I should have read the instructions!

Fortunately, the king of all disasters hasn’t created much havoc for me… yet. But there have been a few incidents such as; O’Shiii…! I dropped my brand new PA! Which was followed by…. ARRRGH… the coupler box is broken!

I guess that I’ve been working so slowly on my layout, that these malicious Gods have taken trips to other model railroader’s homes. The most recent trip they took was to Albuquerque, NM. While they were there they visited poor Pete Nolan. Rumor has it that Pete invoked all three of the Gods names in one sentence!
I believe it went something like this:
“O’Shiiiiii….! I’m falling….ARRRRGGGHHH… through my layout…. OUCH that hurts!”

I’m so sorry, Pete, that I couldn’t keep them locked up in Mt. Calamity. I hope everything is going well for you now that they’ve returned..

 

Ron-

A posting entity on another board has referred to me as a priest, so I can qualifiedly advise you (since I have a direct link to the heavens) that everything you have said is true. However, I do have two solutions.

1. Money.

Money will purchase the replacement units/parts that have been lost, destroyed or damaged.

Money will purchase either reference materials or tutors to help with ignorance or misinformation.

Money will purchase a veritable cornucopia of tools, paints, all manner of scenery, scratchbuilding materials and kits.

Money will purchase the finest in medical assistance for depression, anger management, accidental burns, cuts, scrapes, muscle spasms, pinched nerves, and osteopathic problems caused by working or operating your road.

Money will purchase all manner of legal pharmacalogical remedies when the above needs a little help.

OR, OR, OR

Share your experiences, plans, results, frustrations and happy endings with the members of Trainboard.

 

It will always be noticed by higher powers when one leaves the bottle of Solvaset open while putting on decals. Your hand will be directed to dip the brush into the Solvaset instead of the small dish of water when wetting tiny decals for the first time.

How do you suppose I would know this?

By the way, I salvaged the decal (see the "Before and After" thread).

 

And I thought the sky was falling, or that the horizon had become detached. Yes, the Train gods must be appeased! I've been spending too much time on ships, so they caused me to destroy the East Harbor.

 

The N Scale TrainGods initiated the collapse of twenty feet of shelving and all it's contents on the top of the JJJ&E at the beginning of June.


Stay cool and run steam......

 

Nolan-

You should not have skimped on that offering to the Neptune Line.

 

Thanks Fellers;
Now I don't feel like the Lone ranger anymore.

Boy am I out of breath. Been running since my last post. I would have stayed longer but I heard a Lovely Young Lady shout, "No, No Daddy, No, I Love Him" then the sound of jacking a shell into a shotgun.

To say I didn't like either of my choices would be a distinct understatement.

UH-OH !! I head the baying of those red-tick blood hounds. BAMM, BAMM. Got me in my brand new Con-Cor Caboose.

I'm a gone, while I still can.
See ya
Ron

 

I offered them my biggest ship ever, the hull of the freighter Beavercove. It was insufficient and not worthy as my first large styrene ship. The Train Gods know when you are cheating with your offerings.

Neptune keeps tabs on things that Overlander and EquusIronus might overlook. I'm sure he's angry that none of my ships have bottoms.

 

Gentlemen
I've enjoyed the posts tonight. It has been fun for me and i hope you folks have also gotten a smile or two from it. All reply posts were very funny and fun to read. I'll toast you all with a cold :beer:

Everyone who posted a reply scares me though. I did not realize there were this many folks in the same mental state as I'm in.

I've finished dismantling my old 4x7 layout tonight and striped it down to the plywood top. Tomorrow I'll take it apart and reuse as much of the lumber as I can on my new "J" shaped layout. It'll be an N-scale,Lenz Set100 DCC, Peco T/O's, and Atlas flex track. All my N scale Locos have been converted to DCC. So I'm ready to roll.

If I need help I hope I haven't worn out my welcome and would like to come back for questions and/or advise.

Thanks all and have a good week.
Ron

 

We always have answers and advise here. Now, whether it's the correct answer or advise is another matter. :angel:

 

Pete said;
"We always have answers and advise here. Now, whether it's the correct answer or advise is another matter. :angel:"

Pete, if you get/give the correct answers and right advise, where's the fun in that? I'm easy, As long as it sounds good I'll most likely buy it :huh:

Why, when I told the PowerSteamGuy about a new six Axel PAM-AM SD40-D in blue/white with the Pam-AM logo and using the five-Digital DCC and included sound. I heard he spent the better part of a week looking for it. He never found it.

I wonder why. :wink2:I'll never :zip:

Ron

Ron

 

What are you talking about??

Seems like you have a vivid imagination. At least post something that has some semblance of truth.

Stay cool and run steam......

 

Hello PowerSteamGuy

I apologize to you. :embarassed: I've never yet had the chance to talk with you on this forum. But may have (your name is very familiar) on at least two other forums. Unless it was someone else using the same name. Sometime I go by the name of a Z camaro, or one with the word oil in it.

No offence was intended to you. And I do have a vivid imagination. Most of the time I try to at least skim the semblance of truth. And in this case I meant no foul or injury by the total fabrication of a tall tale using your name in it.

Your name just stood out in my memory because, 1) I like the name, 2) I like most of your posts. I'm not sucking up or justifying it, just explaining it's use. Sometimes I cross the line and use folks names in vain. Just because my humor is a little bent.

Anyways, have a good day.
Ron

 

Next time, I volunteer my name (Nolan) or that of my good buddy TulipMan (Fotheringill). We are both anti-heroes here.:angel: The only differences between us are that I am tall and have a full head of hair, while he is short and bald. We both play golf--I am atrocious; he might be less so. Mark writes about his Lessons Learned; I write about my Stupid Mistakes. This fits us perfectly. TulipMan by day is a lawyer, who has learned plenty about the foibles of model railroading, thus Lessons Learned. Nolan is by day a writer, whose foibles in model railroading have taught him nothing, thus Stupid Mistakes.