I never thought it would come to this

This has been an interesting read.

Now everyone don't take this wrong but maybe if you have a problem with everyone in general, Maybe the problem isn't "everyone" else.

I'll give an example, I am the foreman of one of the better known and requested signal construction gangs on the entire BNSF system. We travel all over the country to work on different projects. At one point my head did swell a bit and I noticed the change in people's attitudes towards me. I of course noticed what I had become and turned back to more work, less ego and things are lots better now. I realized everyone wasnt the problem, I was it.

Food for thought.

 

I dont know Floridaboy as i am new to the forum. But i can feel his frustration. I am in mt Pocono now but moved from central Florida. I belonged to a local club some years back and had a similar experience. Although the modelling techniques i learned from the other members is still very valuable to me. But there were those who felt the need to criticize. An example, there was a section on the club layout that for years was not sceniced. So i decided to. Ballist the track(which had to be done the only way the club president allowed) . Then put in some mountain cuts along the track (Hand carved, taught by another member). And ground cover with clump foliage. Well soon into the project people would come up and tell me how they would have done it ,or that they were going to do something different. I replied with "well than you should have". That was the end of my club days.
I have noticed reading other people's threads that it is similar here. I feel if someone is asking for advice have at it.
But if a forum member is just wanting to share his work with others, be positive nothing hurts feelings more than being proud of an accomplishment then having some one point out something that is so trivial. We are in this hobby for our enjoyment. And what makes us happy. Sometimes we dont have anyone in our area to share with so the forum is a way to share. If something is not how the "RR would do it". So what, if it works and your happy.
Still on the fence
Joe

 

+2

We make our own happiness, and so it's our choice to be unhappy or happy with our life experiences. Personally, I choose to not let people bother me so much that it negatively influences my life.

If you associate with humans, it soon becomes obvious that there are some who you are not going to get along with.

But, sometimes, ya gotta do what ya gotta do...and then live with the consequences.

Good luck!

Cheerio!
Bob Gilmore

 

As long as human beings exist, there will be differing opinions, I enjoy the hobby for what I give as well as get.

 

Differing opinions are OK with me, I sure welcome different ideas on how to do things. When people go on to tell you your ideas/ways suck then that were the problem begins.


On another forum I voted for loco of the year, no rules. I voted for the Arnold U25C, great running loco. First the loco was bashed as an old school piece of junk, and I was ridiculed for even placing the vote. Even though it was only from a few members is seems like the whole forum was involved.

 

I have been involved with a club for almost 20 years and during that time I have seen all sorts of people in the club. Some I could bond with while others, well, not so much. Some people just do not fit in a club environment. Others could fit in but let other factors determine their decision. You got to weigh the positives and the negatives. In my case the positives far outweighed the negatives. Others may go the other way. One can always retreat to the basement or train room and isolate themselves from the world but interacting with others adds a richness to the hobby. Everybody is not equal in their talents. We all have our strengths and weaknesses. My weakness (one of them) is electrical. Oh I'm good with white wire and black wire but throw in resisters, diodes and capacitors and my eyes will glaze over. But I know that there are electrical engineers in our club that I can go to for help. And they will help.

When we set up our layout for a train show we will have many people come up and tell us what they did on their layout or how they would do something different. I listen to them and then ask them if they want to join us because we could use their talent. None do. I often wonder if they really accomplished what they said they did. Then there are those who come up and ask questions. We get most of our new members from this group of people.

 

The fact that model railroading clubs have been around for over 75 years, is a good thing. The bad thing is that this issue of personalities and rules comes up on the boards at least ten times a year. I know I'm tired of the same discussion every month and probably some others are too. My best advice is to join up with the idea that the 'club' situation may not work. When you see that it doesn't get out and enjoy your own model railroad. Jim:headspin:

 

I tend to shy away from all clubs. There is always those people who think they own it or their lives revolve around it. In life you have to put up with enough jack @#&% because they are family or you work with them. No reason to put up with them in your personal time if you have the choice.

 

Very well said!

 

If my hobby made me that miserable I'd find another hobby!

 

I think you nailed it. Fun or not, the choice is up to you, not the people you choose to hang with. I think if you don't enjoy the hobby itself, you should leave it. I have met many people in the hobby, but I choose to associate with a small group, because we share interests and have fun together.

I have met many people I don't care for, they may have a good thing going, but they don't add to my enjoyment, so I don't need to hang with them.

I personally dislike the posts where people act like a little kid leaving the sandbox. If you want to leave, leave, don't come here and see how many people will beg you to stay. Take your negative perspective and be gone. That's just my take.

 

I am in this hobby to have fun.I have received much help for my projects here. I remember years ago on the Atlas N scale forum that I started a post about How I liked my new Bachmann spectrum N&W j. One poster called them junk and stated how bad a friends ran ,his description of the gears drive and its problems did not match the J. I just ignored the negative post,but others asked to see photos of the drive and stated that this was not a Bachmann J new or old. This started a back and fourth argument with the poster that stated they were junk getting angry and latter posting how he was leaving the atlas forum. Who was at fault?
Some times I think people take unimportant things way to serious. model trains are a hobby,it is a way to relax,is it worth getting all worked up about?

 

"There ain't no easy answers." - It was a phrase my father was fond of using when I was pushing up against the outside edge of the envelope. Sometimes I toughed it out. Other times? I gave in.
There is a very active model railroad club just 15 minutes by foot from me. I've seen their work and they are very good. So, why don't I join them? I'm not a 'joiner'. I don't get along with most people. I'm pretty sure I know why and it ain't changing. Most of the time I can keep it to myself with a shrug but, unfortunately if I slip people understandably get annoyed, (or worse).
Outstanding Mods on Trainboard
Online I can walk away. I can step back and take a breather. Maybe I'll apologize and move on. It just depends. The mods here help keep me on the curvy and broad without stepping over and solid red lines. They have been fair and reasonable in applying the rules. This is what keeps me returning even after a multi month hiatus or two.


I do usually get along one-on-one or two or three with people.
I have broken bread with at least six active memebers from Trainboard. I have spoken on the phone with a few and have the email addys of at least a dozen more. I'd love to get them all in a club together. Oh, wait, they already are, Trainboard.

@Florida Boy - Follow your heart. Do what is best for you, your friends and family.
Oh, and maybe don't close your account, just take a breather.

 

Jim Wiggin, We have a RC flying field here in San Diego. A golfing buddy flew them and took me out to watch them fly. I know what you mean about egos, but this day one particular fellow treated me like royalty. He had a 'big' Red Baron tri-wing biplane, and it was easily the plane there that day. Next time I was golfing I told my buddy what a great fellow that fellow was. He started laughing and said, "Yes, and do you know his personal net worth is in the BILLIONS?" I look back on RC flying as one of those days when a billionaire and gentleman spent some time with me. Sadly, many folks in MR clubs lack some of the social graces we wish everybody could have. Jim

 

My sentiments exactly!

 

Have been reading this thread over the days it has been up. I just have learned that, having been an egocentric #$%*ole in the past, and eating dirt for it, some of us can be and may grow out of it! Some may not. So, I don't let it eat at me if someone doesn't like what I have built or what I enjoy, because it is for me to enjoy!

I have participated in the Livingston, MT Model RR club years ago when it first started, and it was a lot of fun, even with differing personalities. Got in touch with them last year after an 18 year hiatus, I moved, and it is still a great bunch of guys.

Having said that, I have also run into the rivet counter snobs t'boot. Don't much care for their opinions, but do enjoy looking at their work, if they have done any!

So, as Ken Davis says, "Lighten up! And live!"

Enjoy your hobby time!

 

I grew up on a farm and still have access to it through relatives so I fly my RC plane there, D bag free. The cows must think I am a huge A-hole when I dive bomb them.....

I avoid the the model train clubs in the city here because of what I have witnessed from bolt counters etc. I have a layout that takes up all four walls of a 12 x 12 room and it keeps my wife and I quite busy and happy.